what's in a number

today i lay in bed - it was 5 am

my bb boy was awake & crying for the 3rd time in 3 hours

i knew something was bothering him so i didn't take it personally

i thought of stuff - like 'hey it's april 30th and officially my birthday'

though only i am aware of that at the moment

it is hard to believe i am 45 that number used to seem so far away

and now i'm here with a 7.5 month old baby

there are only 116 days of mat leave remaining

time ticks by so quickly

i don't feel any different than i did when i was 26 (random number)

other than some aches & pains that i'm not sure can be addressed by rub a535

and perhaps a attitude of gratefulness that i have not had before

it is now 10am bb boy is sleeping bb daddy has cleaned the condo

the sun is shining! i have time to take a shower...

& i will take the new age on happily - yay 45 yay bliss